Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I love how my cats smell like pot.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
