Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
