Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
