I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize
