the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
