I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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