I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
