I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Randomize
