Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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