I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
