Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize