Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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