Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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