he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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