and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
