At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
