I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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