It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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