you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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