I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
