He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
is that a dick in a sweater?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
