She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
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