It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
