How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
