I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
i think my cat just said my name.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
