Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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