I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
