i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
