dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
