I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize