I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
