Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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