I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
