hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
