is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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