Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
