belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
