i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
