Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
