You made me cry and you don't even care
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
