Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
