She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
