Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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