You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
