I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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