before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
