the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize