The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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