dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Drunk is not a location!
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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