his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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