D3 body, D1 cock
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
