So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
